Shit Agent phones Mother Theresa

SA:

Now then this is fantastic this, I'm gonna turn this into a big earner I tell yer, my big day in show business this. I'd wish this woman would put a number in the Yellow Pages. Took me ages to get her number.

(brriiiinng brrrrinnng)

MT:

Hello...

SA:

Hello, yes lisetn Mother Theresa...where the fuck have you been?

MT:

Eh!

SA:

Been trying to get hold of you...oh bollocks I've been cut off, gonna have to get the book out again now. If it was in the Yellow Pages under M for Mother we could sort this out in no time. Instead of this pissing about. She's probably a bit busy at the moment, she'll spare time for me when she hears this. What a top idea this is...

(brriiiinng brrrrinnng)

MT:

Hello...

SA:

Shit Agent here, no don't put the phone down, right...I've been onto Shit Promoter and we've come up with a great idea...no hang on a minute... a concert for poor people...now what it is we're gonna get Wembley Stadium right love...and we get Oasis, Blur, Pulp, Dave Bowie, Rocking Ricky and the Velvet Colours one of my acts, blow your socks off, well blow your habib more like...lets forget all that...the details, all you need to know is one hundred thousand people...ten pounds a ticket, don't have to be the brain of Britain, don't need a calculator, a million pounds...a million pounds on the door ...now here's the crack is that you make sure everybody who comes brings a double portion of Uncle Bens Boil in the Bag rice...Now here's the crack, you give the rice to the poor people like in the North-East...perhaps Middlesborough, and all around that area...adn we split the money seventy-fourty in my favour...hello... hello...Mother...fuck my hat, I've done it again bloody hell, I don't know I think she put the fucking phone down. She's got no business mind...she'll never get on.